


Voltron: The Weed Number

by Voretron



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Diary/Journal, Found Footage, Gen, Journalism, Mystery, Please read and help me figure out what this is, Strange Object, What the fuck did I find, bad language, im not good at tags, top quality stuff man I swear, voltron legendary defender - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-12
Updated: 2017-07-22
Packaged: 2018-11-13 04:41:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 2,572
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11177244
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Voretron/pseuds/Voretron
Summary: So, I found a thing dumpster diving at Dreamworks. Figured you guys would like to know about it.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Will try to update daily, maybe...

Voltron: The Weed Number

June 11, 2017

The other day I was out chillin with my hmoeslice in the Glendale area. Being stupid and enjoying each others company. We decided to do some sigh seeing, as I do not visit this area often. I was only in the area because my mother needed to run a few errands and acquire some thing for some stupid art project or some shit. She doesn’t trust me enough to leave me home alone, not since the matchbox incident of ’06 but that’s a different story.  
My mother is friends with the owner of some fabric store that in the area, and I’ve known her son since I was about 4 and were almost kind of good friends. So he decided to take me around to see some of the movie studios and animation places that are in the are, we made all the major stops, Walt Disney studios and the like. But the one that caught my attention and slightly made me piss myself with glee, was when we stopped at Dreamworks Animation.  
Saying that I was excited is an understatement of probably the last 2,000 years of history, which could only be rivaled by the excitement that the apostles probably felt when Jesus showed up and was just like hey fam.  
My friend only intended these stops to literally be stops. Having only pulled over for a few seconds before rocketing off at the other stops. Having used my skills of mediocre deduction and basic ability to notice patterns, I was prepared this time. I leap from the car just as the car same to an almost complete stop. This obviously pissed off my friend as he promised his mother we wouldn’t be gone for way to long, and by the time we had gotten to dreamworks we had already been gone for half and hour. Wanting to make it back within the hour, my friend scolded me from the car yelling about how not counting for traffic it was going to take at least 20 minutes to get home, LA traffic am I right ;D.  
Obviously, I would not be allowed inside the building because little old me being from the other side of the tracks, looked like I was up to no good, and was most likely the brownest thing in a 5-mile radius, decided the only way I was going to find some sort of souvenir from this trip was to look for scraps of thrown out art in the nearby dumpster. My friend, having now gotten out of the car must have concluded this was my plan, based off the slight change in my body language, breathing patter, and dilated pupils as I laid eyes on the dumpster. Either that of because I looked him dead in the eye and said, “I bet there are some goodies in there.”  
Moving as fast I could I leaped with the grace of an aquatic mammal that also leaps with such grace and majesty. I begin to dig through the pile of garbage like a rat who digs through garbage, looking of tasty scrapes of things to take home and hang on my wall of fandoms. Slowly as I began to move heaps over trash and stuff, I noticed shredded up bits of concept art. And that’s when I noticed it, Some of these torn piece of colorful pieces as bits of the iconic Voltron: Legendary Defender V logo (See figure. 1), I squeed with delight. I had hit the mother load. At this point my friend was throwing a major bitch fit about me dumpster diving, so in order to shut him up, I shoved handfuls of shreds into my pocket, and that is when I noticed it. A Larger square looking things that had a crudely made label on it that simply said Voltron: The weed number. I grabbed it, shoved it up my shirt to hide it as I ran back to the car. Security wouldn’t catch me this time. 

FIGURE 1.  
This is the V thing I was talking about  
https://68.media.tumblr.com/bbe2d1f8ee2d433f9840fda9264ba028/tumblr_ocghhdWWQe1rj7fzlo1_500.png


	2. June 12, 2017

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A thing I found in the dumpster outside the Dreamworks Animation Place. Thought you guys would like to hear about it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short update. I have no Clue what this hunk of junk is.

June 12, 2017

We returned home rather late in the afternoon so I just kind of threw all the contents from my pockets and the square thing on my desk and didn’t bother to fuck with it till tomorrow, which is currently today.   
There isn’t much to be said about the square shaped container other then that it was square, plain black, and had a label that looked like the old labels you see in movies, before they figure out how to make print labels. The kind that is made from black plastic film that turns white when the letters are stamped into the film. Only this didn’t look old and worn down like it had been made years ago. The film is still glossy and shiny, the letters still white and legible. Looked pretty good overall. It just smelled like something you would find in a dumpster, but that’s because it was found in the dumpster.   
Other than what I had just described about it the only other thing I knew about it was that I found it dumpster diving and that I was mine. Finders keepers Dreamworks, suck my ass.   
After messing with it I was able to open it. It taped shut with one of those circle sticky tape things you find on boxes, like when you get something from bed bath and beyond and try and open the box with your bare hands, but you cant rip the circle tape off because its too strong and you end up ripping the box, one of those things was keeping the, what I can only assume to be a case, closed. I was finally able to open it and find a record looking thing inside of it, stored neatly in sleeve of the inside cover. Upon pulling it out, it was probably about the size of a vinyl, I don’t own any and have never seen any personally to give a good enough description of how similar it looks to a record. But that what it looked it look. However, it was shiny and glossy like a CD. So, maybe its like vinyl 2.0 or something?  
It also looked really fragile, so I put it back because I didn’t wanna fuck it up. I have no clue what this thing is, and even if I knew what it was I probably don’t have anything that would allow me to play.   
But I have shit to do today so, I’ll figure it out later and when I feel like it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Update again tomorrow, maybe.


	3. June 13, 2017

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Update on the thing I found in the trash.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short update, I included a photo of the disc in the bottom note.

June 13, 2017

I’m not sure how many people are actually reading this, but if anyone is, I didn’t wanna leave you guys without another update. So, I just measured the case and the disk, and decided to put it up. I mean that counts as content right?  
I don’t have much to say, Im still not entirely sure what this thing is, I wanna ask my mom about it, she’s old as fuck so maybe she’s familiar with this kind of technology? I don’t know but I know that I’ve never seen anything like this. But, im still not sure how to explain to her that I stole this out of a dumpster. Especially from the dumpster of a major animation study who could sue the fuck out of my family. I’ll have to come up with some sort of story about how I found it.   
Anyways, the case measures about 12. 25 inches by 12. 25 inches, at least I think, I’m not very good with a measuring tape, but I’m a hell of an estimator.   
The disk itself is has a radius of about 4 inches. Using basic math, its about 8 inches in diameter, and is approximately 25.13 inches in circumfrance, thanks pi <3, This thing is kind of big I guess.   
I still haven’t figure out if it goes into a computer, or something like a record player? 

This thing doesn’t even have the standard like, lines in it that you see on a record, it just looks like an oversized cd. It’s very shinny and reflective, which is why I keep saying it looks like a C, it is not black and glossy like a standard record. Maybe it’s like a momma cd that has given birth to all the cds and dvds that are in current circulation? Tell me your secrets Momma CD what in all that is holy are you?   
I look a picture of the disc and will leave an imgur link so you guys can see it.   
I cant post any pictures of the cover, because I mean I stole It out of the trash, I probably shouldn’t be showing off the cover just in case someone is looking for it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> link to the photo of the thing.   
> Imgur link: http://imgur.com/a/hEJZo


	4. June 14,2017

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If you're this deep and dont know the drill by now, why are you like this?

June 14, 2017

So this one dude who keeps commenting tells me that the thing I mentioned in the last “chapter” is a laser disc.

Jokes on you fucker, I’m not stupid and I don’t need you to be fuckin with me by making shit up.

Is what I could of said if the little fuck wasn’t right. I guess laser discs are like dinosaur CDs. Upon doing very little research, and reading a few Wikipedia articles, its seems that these things were pretty cool back in the day. 

Other than being fuckin huge and a great pain in the ass to use, I mean if you wanted to watch Titanic on fuckin laser disc, you need to first, get yourself checked out. What kind of ass hat decided to watch Titanic on a fuckin laser disc, but then you would need to get up and change the disc 4 time. Disc one would have the first half on both sides, which means you have to get up and flip the fuckin disc, then like 30 minutes later get up to change to disc two, then go to disc 2 side b like 30 minutes later. Why anybody thought this was a good idea I will never know. 

Aside from them being a hug pain in the ass, legend has it that if you look through the hole of a laserdisc you can see the future. While I will keep that in mind for later, I will not be able to watch with unless ya gurl can find a laser disc player or something.   
Look out ebay and the shadiest parts of craigslist here I come.


	5. June 15,2017

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You know the drill fam

Nothing new, still looking for a laserdisc player.

But on a side note I found battletoads for the SNES for 30 bucks *puts in shopping cart*

Will update when I found a laserdisc player.


	6. June 27, 2017

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You know the deal already bro, I don't need to carry you. But I will if you want me too ;)

HOLY FUCK MY FUCKS.  
I FOUND A GOD DAMN LASERDISC PLAYER AT THE MUDDA FUCKIN SWAP MEET.

Praise the Lord for hoarders because I wouldnt of been able to find it it some old cuck didn't hoard it away. 

It smells like cat piss and is covered in Indiana Jones level of dust but he promised me worked.

only cost me about 20 bucks. That was almost as good of a deal as that time that France gave America a hell of a good deal. 

I will be cleaning it up a bit before I pop the weed number and see what this pupper is holdin inside of its sleek sliver curves, and beautifully round center hole. 

Sorry it took so long to update  
I'm a lazy fucker and took may naps that lasted for way too long. 

To end on an even better note, battle toads showed up yesterday, game on motherfuckers.


	7. July 22,2017

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> guess who's back bitches.

Sup gutter sluts, your gurl is back. I cleaned the laserdisc player and i think it works. Idk i havent tried it yet, I lost the weed number. My room got pretty messy over the past few weeks. I didnt wanna say anything because what kind of fucker loses a thing t

hat big in their room. But I did because I suck, and dont feel like cleaning my room so suck my ass. You want to find out what on the thing clean it for me. Till i find the motivation to do so ya'll are gunna have to wait. In the mean time, I will tell you about the dream i had the other night.

Enjoi.

**Establishing shot of Washinton DC  
**

**Slow zoom onto the front of the Whitehouse.**

**It's quiet, too quiet, but then the west wing of the white house is blown out.**

**a big explosion shakes the entire white house and part of the surrounding area.**

**A big fuzzy mass is seen jumping from the newly formed hole and runs through the rubble and dust onto the lawn before running off as fast it can.**

**It is a Grizzly bear, he is visibly frightened as he runs full speed off further into the grounds of the white house.**

**He looks over his shoulder and there, amongst the dust and rubble stands a tall muscular figure, the points his large finger at the bear.**

**The bear lets our a growl of terror as he picks up speed.**

**The figure puts his fingers to his mouth as whistles like he is calling a cab.**

**He then jumps from the second level of the white house form the hole in the wall and does a flip.**

**As he soars through the air two alligators with reigns and bridle in their mouth run at top gator speed.**

**The man lands perfectly in his chariot and whips the reigns.**

**The gators take off after the bear.**

**The bear is visibly tired, panting, he needs to rest but knows the fight is not over.**

**Then he hears it, a familiar hearty sea captain's laugh.**

**He looks frightened. He is near.**

**Not knowing which direction to run, the bear hesitates, then the sun is blotted out.**

**The bear looks up and notices and sees a the figure dive bombing down towards him.**

**In a last attempt of self defense the bear rises to his hind legs and lets out a mighty growl, but this as he would soon learn was  a mistake.**

**The man tucks his arms into his body adding a a half twist to his rapid decent and lands justs behind the bear.**

**He grabs the bear around his abdomen and suplexs the bear into the ground, the bear slumps over in defeat.**

**The muscular gentleman then places his boot covered foot on the bears back and once again lets out a hearty laught.**

Man: Better luck next time Bernard, you almost got away - _This time._

**The bear shakes its head and looks up and the man before rolling out from under his boot and playfully tackles the man.  
**

**The man lets out another laugh and pushes the bear off before rising and dusting off his slacks and adjusting his suspenders.  
**

Man: I better get back to business before the missus realizes i've been gone.

**The man and bear walk side by side back to the white house, they stop dead in their tracks as they see a small feminine figure standing in the hole, visibly angry clutching her fan.**

Women: TEDDY!!!

**Cut to black**

**text fades in as the triumphant sound of bugles and drums plays in the background**

_**Theodore Roosevelt: American Hero** _

 

And then I woke up.

See you later fuckers.

 

 

 

 


End file.
